Team Isabel: Gummy Bears, Shakespeare, and Jeff the Rat

Isaac Jo • Elivia Goodin • Abbie Daigle • Nicole Sua • Heidi Schoenhals • Ben Green • Hadley Green • Josiah Long • Anna Stone • Mia Holmgren • Eliana Cetola • Vivienne Mestraud • Declan Miles • Cora Roberts • Dorcas Sheng

Lucy Lafferty stared at the clock as it wound down to one. Precisely when the hour struck, she hit enter, sending, Thanks so much for class! I have to go now, but see y’all next week! into the chat.

Of course, like all good, learning-loving TPSers, she wasn’t always quite so anxious to leave class, but today was different. Today had been circled in red on her calendar for almost a year (I. ROGERS); it was the day she would get on a plane to St. Helena, where, apparently, a former teacher needed the collective talent of last year’s class in classical language and literature (H. GREEN). 

Fortunately, Lucy had packed her bag last night and made sure to cram in her camera; she couldn’t wait to get some shots of Jonathan the Tortoise to share with her classmates (V. MESTRAUD).  

On the way to the airport, Lucy suddenly screamed out loud to her mom “I forgot my favorite stuffed animal!” Without her stuffed rat, Lucy simply could not sleep (M. HOLMGREN). 

But as a mother and thus having infinite foresight, Lucy’s mom produced Jeff the Rat out of her own backpack and handed him back to Lucy with a warning to, “Remember him next time because I won’t bring him for you” (A. STONE). Lucy snatched her precious rat from her mother with a mumbled thanks and turned to gaze out the window in anticipation (H. SCHOENHALS).

Two hours later, she found herself staring out the plane window instead of the car; she was only slightly nervous for her first solo flight, and at least she had Jeff to keep her company (A. DAIGLE). Settling into her seat, she pulled her notebook out of her carry-on backpack, where she’d copied down her former teacher’s cryptic email message all her classmates had gotten as well: Meet me in St. Helena on the Ides of March at the X marking the spot on the attached map file. I need your help with a top secret project. Be sure to bring with you a frying pan, your laptop, at least four empty toilet paper tubes, extra gummy bears, and a squirt gun (E. CETOLA). Any unnecessary baggage will be left at the hotel during our day trips. Lucy couldn’t help but smile at how mysterious her teacher was acting, even through email (V. MESTRAUD). It had been pretty difficult to convince her parents that it wasn’t a scam, and that even given its authenticity that she should be allowed to go, but she had managed by sparing some of the extra gummy bears to eat with them while talking it over (I. JO). 

After rough air, a cute but crying two-year-old, and an entire bag of gummy bears, Lucy landed. Greeting her at the gate was an unfamiliar girl who introduced herself as Charis and said she was from the other section (H. GREEN). 

“Mrs. Rivera is waiting in the bus, and everyone else is here, so let’s get moving!” The words spilled out of Charis’s mouth as she bounced on her toes. “The contest is tomorrow; we still need to get everything figured out, discuss strategies, and get to know each other! They have an engineering class from TPS here too. I don’t know why.” (A. DAIGLE). 

Suddenly though, Lucy realized: she had forgotten to write her research paper for her English class! So the whole entire car ride, instead of socializing, Lucy wrote (M. HOLMGREN). As she frantically scribbled down her thoughts, it occurred to her that she might have forgotten to pack something, but she couldn’t put her finger on what (J. LONG). She had the things Mrs. Rivera asked for plus a few extra gummy bears, which were the most important thing by far, so what could she be missing? (D. MILES). 

Then like a rushing boulder from Indiana Jones it hit her, she had left Jeff! How was she going to take photos of her beloved rat riding the Tortoise now? Desperately glancing around the bus she spotted something pink and sparkly, a stuffed hamster peeking out of a backpack. (A. STONE). All of a sudden, the bus gave a great lurch, and the distinct sound of someone frantically yodeling drifted in from the outside (E. CETOLA). As everyone shuffled around, trying to regain balance, Lucy accidentally bumped into multiple people, eliciting glares from those she hit (J. LONG). 

As they stumbled back into their seats, the voice of Mrs. Rivera boomed through an invisible loudspeaker. “Greetings, my fantabulous students. Due to an unexpected disturbance, the necessity for your intellectual brilliance grows ever more critical. You must get started as soon as possible. The contest begins NOW” (C. ROBERTS).

“But…what are we doing?” Lucy didn’t realize she’d said her thoughts out loud until Charis tugged at her arm, pointing to a sign that read, “Shakespeare’s Slingshots: Where Literature and Engineering Combine.” Underneath was a photo of two people: one reading from an old-timey scroll, and the other seemingly preparing to launch a gummy bear out of a catapult-like object (A. DAIGLE). 

The voice on the loudspeaker continued “…pair number four! Lucy Lafferty and Charis Everhart…” (H. SCHOENHALS).

Lucy jolted at the sound of her name, but Charis grabbed her hand and eagerly started running in the direction of the “Shakespeare’s Slingshots” sign.

“You have all your gear, right?” Charis asked as she led Lucy through a doorway below the sign. Lucy found herself in a pitch-black cave. 

“Your frying pan!” Charis called, lifting her own as though it were a sword and looking around cautiously but unable to erase her eager smile (I. ROGERS). 

“For your challenge, if you dare to accept it, you and your partner must choose one person to engage in a duel with someone else’s partner, while the other dramatically narrates the fight in Shakespearean English,” continued the loudspeaker. “Your weapons may consist of any creative combination of the items I told you to bring” (E. CETOLA). 

“I know Homeric Greek; does that count?” called out Charis in the general direction of the loudspeaker. 

“NO.” it boomed. “DID YOU NOT READ ALL THE PLAYS MRS. RIVERA ASSIGNED?” 

“Most of them? Whether I remember the language is another matter entirely… at least I took a fencing class.” Lucy briefly panicked at being volunteered for the narration like that, then remembered she was wearing a shirt containing the entirety of Mark Antony’s funeral oration (H. GREEN). She decided not to ask if the proposed duel was supposed to be to the death—mainly she did not want to think about the possibility, but she also realized that if she stayed ignorant of the rules she could strategically complain afterwards if something went wrong (I. JO).

Suddenly, lights illuminated the arena-like cave. Lucy looked around uncertainly when two boys ran into the arena, panting and dressed in full Roman garb, the shorter in regal robes and the taller in military uniform.

“Sorry we’re late!” called the shorter of the two.

The second glared at Lucy and Charis. It was Simon. She didn’t know how she knew—after all, Lucy had never seen his face—but without him even speaking a word, Lucy knew it was the owner of the voice who could recite every Shakespeare play by heart. The one who raised his hand at every question, whose papers no one could improve, who knew the definition of every word in the dictionary… Simon.

Even Charis seemed taken aback for a second before brandishing her frying pan. “I suppose thou wilt be the one to attempt a strike against me?” she ventured.

Simon said nothing but reached to his side. Charis almost laughed when he retrieved two plastic squirt guns with no change to his threatening look.

“SIMON AND TIM WILL FACE CHARIS AND LUCY!” the speaker bellowed, followed by the sounding of a horn. Simon charged at Charis.

“Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears,” Lucy began, struggling to read upsidedown.

Tim’s nervous gulp at his turn made way for a grin, “I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him,” he read

“The evil that men do lives after them,” Lucy continued, at first intending to turn around so he could not see the speech, but then deciding against it at Tim’s relief. 

They continued as Charis attempted to sweep Simon’s legs from under him with her frying pan and his streak of water missed her face until they reached the end, at which point they were shouting over the pants and general clatter of the skirmish. 

“What’s the point of this?” Lucy finally called, unable to suppress her curiosity.

“To decide who’s worthy, of course!” Tim called back.

“Worthy of what?” Lucy screeched, Simon and Charis fully engrossed in the fight.

“Worthy to embark on a quest to save Jonathan the Tortoise, of course!” Tim called back.

“Jonathan the Tortoise?”

“Didn’t you know? He’s gone missing. The only thing left behind by his captors was a battered copy of Hamlet and The Engineering Book, so the best and brightest minds in Shakespearean studies and engineering have been summoned.”

“That’s us?”

“Why of course! You don’t think just anyone survives a TPS course, do you?”

“I guess not,” Lucy shrugged, remembering that morning’s research paper. Simon and Charis continued in furious battle.

“Gummy bear break!” Charis called, panting heavily. 

“Fine,” Simon replied, collapsing on the ground in exhaustion.

Charis did the same when she reached Lucy.

“Here,” Lucy offered her some gummy bears, which Charis gratefully took. “You’re doing great!”

“Thanks,” Charis smiled. “I just wish… I need something heaiver…”

“How’s my narration?”

“Good, good,” Charis said absentmindedly. “But it doesn’t quite fit, you know? Maybe you should use something from Hamlet, that’s my favorite. I have a copy in my bag.”

As Lucy walked over to the big bag, she heard Charis mutter under her breath, “What I wouldn’t give for The Engineering Book… where could it have gone?”

Lucy froze in place. 

When the fight resumed, she quickly called Tim over and explained everything.

“So much for being from the other section,” Tim sighed. 

He then dumped all his toilet paper tubes on the floor, pulled a match out of his bag, and set the pile on fire.

“What are you—”

“Do you have any gummy bears?” he asked, glancing at Simon’s squirt guns, now refueled and squirting violently in Charis’s direction.

“Is that really going to work?”

“Yep!”

So Lucy brought the two five-pound bags she had. They heated the gummy bears in the frying pan until they were completely melted.

“We’re going to have to move quickly, before it hardens,” Tim said, loading his and Lucy’s squirt guns with the liquid bears.

“Let’s do this,” Lucy smiled.

“FOR JONATHAN!” they cried. 

An entirely unassuming Charis was quickly covered in congealed gummy bears, and Simon’s continued spray of water cooled it into an inescapable case around her arms and legs.

“How could you do this to Jonathan?” Lucy asked.

“I, I…” Charis broke down into tears, “I just wanted to be remembered for something… like Shakespeare. I never wanted to hurt Jonathan—or anyone—when I heard this competition had caught on… I thought if I won I would be remembered for that. Then I would return Jonathan…” 

“You can always write your own plays,” Simon suggested.

And that’s just what Charis did… after she paid a fine and returned Jonathan, of course. She became a world-renowned playwright and always says Shakespeare, and Jonathan the Tortoise, are her biggest inspirations. Simon went on to become a professor of Shakespearean studies—and volunteers with a troop that reenacts Shakespearean battles in his free time. Tim started a billion-dollar company selling non-fatal weapons. And Lucy enjoys a quiet life with no research papers, last-minute trips to St. Helena, or mysterious challenges—just lots of Shakespeare with now-recovered Jeff the Rat.

Photo Credit: www.sthelenatourism.com/jonathans-190th-birthday/