Declan: Ladies and Gentlemen, students and teachers–hold on, do teachers read these? Anyways, today I’m interviewing the 11 year old Beau Green.
Beau: Hi.
Declan: What grade are you and what classes are you taking?
Beau: I’m in fifth grade, and I have Elementary Science, Math Fundamentals 5, Elementary Humanities, Writing Adventures 5, Reading Action 5, and Elementary Grammar.
Declan: Okay, how many years have you done TPS?
Beau: This is my first year.
Declan: Cool, where do you live?
Beau: Des Moines, Iowa.
Declan: Nice, any pets?
Beau: Yes, one dog named Belle.
Declan: How many siblings do you have?
Beau: Three sisters and one brother.
Declan: What is the weirdest food you’ve ever eaten?
Beau: I haven’t eaten many weird foods. Is crab weird? I’ve eaten shark. I guess it could be weird.
Declan: Crab tastes good. Do you play an instrument or sport?
Beau: I played football in the fall, and I’ve played guitar for three years.
Declan: What are some of your favorites?
Beau: Sharks, comedy, Jim Gaffigan’s comedy routine called Vitamins, the color blue, summer, fishing, boating, cross country skiing, reading, steak, and the P-51-D-10 mustang plane.
Declan: Good list. What are some least favorites?
Beau: Pickles and olives, purple, classical music, least favorite sibling—just kidding, and spring; it’s just always too wet.
Declan: Okay, what are some fun facts about you?
Beau: I think that the funniest fact or the coolest fact is that one time I went to Florida, and we were in the bay, and I caught a twelve foot nurse shark. It was about 200-300 pounds. We didn’t get it in the boat because it was too big, and it took four minutes to catch it. More fun facts: my brother Ben is the International Correspondence Columnist at clay, I have a jon boat, I’ve caught another shark that was like two feet, I like airplanes, nonfiction books, and I‘ve sat in a Blue Angel.
Declan: Nice list. Would you rather be able to stop time or travel in time?
Beau: Oh wow, that is a hard one. I’d travel a couple years in the future, but my friends stay the same age.
Declan: Alright, speed round: burgers or fries?
Beau: Burgers.
Declan: Pancakes or waffles?
Beau: Pancakes definitely. They’re easier to spread butter on.
Declan: Captain America or Thor?
Beau: Captain America.
Declan: TV show or movies?
Beau: TV shows because they are longer, unless it’s a movie series.
Declan: Peanut butter or jelly?
Beau: Peanut butter.
Declan: Snakes or lizards?
Beau: Uh, snakes. Snakes are basically lizards without feet.
Declan: Would you rather hang out with friends or be by yourself?
Beau: Depends on the day but probably with friends.
Declan: Who do you want to be like when you grow up?
Beau: I don’t know, but I can tell you what I want to be when I grow up.
Declan: That works.
Beau: A fighter pilot.
Declan: Sounds cool and maybe fun. Have any funny stories?
Beau: Yes, I do. One time my brother Ben was drinking grape juice, and when I told a joke, the juice went out his nose. Here are a few more: I was in Minnesota, and my grandpa and I went out on a boat, and we both cast our lines out on the same side, which you’re not supposed to do, and we tipped over. It was a little scary because there’s a lot of snapping turtles in the lake. Another story in the same lake: my uncle was using my lure and lost it, and later, I caught the same fish and got the lure back.
Declan: Okay in that case—which superhero do you think you’re most like?
Beau: I’ll go with Captain America.
Declan: Nice, what’s your favorite Bible verse?
Beau: Genesis 1, when God created the world.
Declan: Cool, that’s all the questions I have. And whoever is reading this, just remember (pauses to grin): Smile while you still have teeth.
Photo Credit: Beau Green
I see no picture…
Neither do I.
me too
Me neither
not here either
Disliking classical music? Must be some sort of mutant.
amen Luke yeet the little brother
I won’t hinder you
You don’t like pickles, classical music, or spring!?!
My question exactly! lol
Why pickles, classical music, and spring are great.
Pickles: they taste great
Classical music: it sounds great
Spring: It means summer’s close
PICKLES FOREVER
What is wrong with olives???
Everything
That’s really cool that you have been in a Blue Angel!
Yeah the Blue Angel plane was in Florida it was an F-18.
HEY MY BIRTHDAY IS IN SPRING jk jk And olives are amazing *^* That’s so cool you got to sit in a Blue Angel!! They are so interesting to watch
nice to meet you Beau! Great article Declan!
i agree with the disliking pickles and olives. but also FINALLY ANOTHER CROSS COUNTRY SKIER. it IS the superior skiing, though downhill is also quite fun
yes it is
Pickles and olives are some of my favorite toppings!! (after mustard)
AVENGE THE PICKLES
I’ve never read an article that aroused so much controversy 🤣
yeah
i’d be honored if i were you wreaking havoc can be fun
BUT i am glad i’m on the side of the interviewee