Humor

Gone to Green Gables

Golden rays of sunlight streamed onto the living room couch, the prime reading spot in the McFarland house. As Fiona plopped down next to her, Lili glanced up from the novel in her hands and asked,“What book are you into right now?”

Beneath the Shadow of Denali. It’s a great book. You?”

She glanced at the redhead on the cover of her book. “Anne of Green Gables.”

“Ah, yes. What part are you at?” Fi raised one eyebrow, a talent that Lili had always envied.

“Breaking the chalkboard over Gilbert’s head.”

“Oooo, that’s my favorite part.”

“Mhmm. Mine too.”

At that moment, Sarah, who had been lying on the couch looking fast asleep, jumped into the conversation. “If you could meet one character from your book, who would you meet?”

The question was a no-brainer. “I’d want to meet Anne. Second-best would be Gilbert or Dianna.” As soon as the words left her mouth, Lili realized her mistake. Teleportation had begun for the sixth time since Lily Tang’s interview.

“Oh no. Oh no-no-no-no-no!”

Upon her return from the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Lili’s parents had forbidden her from teleporting unsupervised for safety reasons. She had agreed after only four days straight of sulking, an unusually reasonable response. She understood their concerns. But now, through no fault of her own, Lili was going to a fictional world again.

It was worth noting, however, that on Anne’s Prince Edward Island, the worst thing that could happen was selling your neighbor’s cow or having your story printed in an advertisement about baking powder. While humiliating, these mishaps were nowhere near the dangers of the MCU or Faraway Land. So, when she arrived, Lili was not terribly frantic to get back home.

Once the green sparkles had faded, she found herself sitting cross-legged on a shady patch of grass beneath a large blossoming cherry tree. A startled gasp came from somewhere above, and Lili craned her head back to see a freckled face leaning out of a window in a white house. The girl had green eyes and flaming red hair that hung on either side of her face in braids. Anne of Green Gables, straight from the pages of L. M. Montgomery’s book.

“Where did you come from?” Anne cried, looking thoroughly astonished.

“Why, I’ve been sitting here for hours.” Teleportation was a complicated concept to explain, especially in a simple town like Avenlea, so it made more sense to be someone Anne could understand than to go into her real backstory.

Cocking her head to one side, Anne replied: “Really? I haven’t seen you before. Do you live in Avenlea?”

“Yes, I do, but I’m away most of the time at a… a boarding school. My name is Lili. Spelled with an i.”

“Are you terribly sad when you’re away at boarding school? I would be if I had to leave Green Gables. I’m Anne, spelled with an e, but could you call me Cordelia? Oh please, please say yes!”

Lili grinned. “Pleasure to meet you, Cordelia. I’m not too sad at boarding school because it’s in a lovely town right near the beach.” The easiest thing to describe was her own home.

“The beach! Oh, you are lucky. The closest thing to a beach here is the Lake of Shining Waters, and while it is beautiful, I would love to hear the sound of waves crashing against the sand.” A far-off look came over her face as she spoke.

Nodding, Lili rose to her feet. “I love listening to the waves, especially at night, when moonlight shines on the water and stars twinkle in the sky.”

With a gasp of delight, Anne murmured, “Oh, how romantic. You sound just like an author!”

Suppressing a smile, Lili replied: “Well, I actually am one. Not professionally, but I do write the most thrilling articles, if I do say so myself.”

“I’m sure you do. Say, would you like to come with me to the Lake of Shining Waters? While it won’t be nearly as romantic as your ocean lit by starlight, it will be sparkling in the morning sun. Everything looks perfectly splendid in the mornings, don’t you think?”

“Absolutely! My parents shouldn’t be missing me for at least an hour.” Who wouldn’t want to spend time with Anne Shirley? After all, she could spend days here and still arrive back home a moment after her departure.

Anne disappeared from the window and ran over to Lili a few seconds later, tossing back to the house, “Marilla, I’m going out!”

“Be back in time for supper!” Marilla called back.

Gleefully, Anne led her to the pond, where they stood hand in hand staring at the crystal-clear water. Struck by a sudden impulse, Lili turned to Anne. “I’m going to see how close I can get to the water without getting wet.”

“Oooooh, me too! Whoever gets closer wins.”

The two girls began edging down the bank, clinging to shrubbery to keep their balance as the dirt turned to mud. Lili was just a toe-length from the water when she heard a shriek and a splash beside her. Droplets rose into the air and sprayed Lili from head to toe as she spun around to see Anne half-submerged in the water, flailing around in panic.

“Hold on, Anne! Grab my hand and I’ll pull you out!”

Anne thrust a dripping hand into the air, and Lili gripped it and dragged her out of the water. Panting, Anne lay on the grass, her beige dress sodden with water.

Lili dropped to her knees beside her friend. “Are you okay?”

Anne’s eyes were closed, and her breathing was frantic. Lili feared she had just killed one of her favorite fictional characters! Suddenly, Anne’s eyes fluttered open, and she sat up with a jerk.

“Wasn’t that exciting? I just had a near death experience! Why, now I can tell Jane Andrews I’ve nearly drowned too! Oh, it will be thrilling to tell everyone. I expect Marilla will forgive me for ruining the dress, considering I nearly died and all.”

Sighing with relief, Lili decided she had caused enough trouble in Anne’s life for one day. Lili whispered the words to send herself home just as Anne looked up. Shock flashed across her freckled face, and as Lili faded away, she heard Anne yelling: “Marilla! Marilla! I’ve just been rescued by a guardian angel!”

Lili smiled, imagining the look on Marilla’s face when Anne told her story. Unfortunately, she was going to be in a lot of trouble for teleporting again.

 

Photo Credits: http://www.christianhumanist.org/2018/04/the-christian-feminist-podcast-episode-81-anne-of-green-gables/

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