Humor, Open Mic

Open Mic: The Class That Made Mrs. Yagel Laugh by Advanced Composition Section 1

*Disclaimer: Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental depending on the section…oh never mind, you’ll see. Just keep reading.

Chapter 1: In which we are introduced to our heros.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year…

The radio sang as Mrs. Y sat snugly in her overstuffed rocking chair, cradling a mug of steaming tea in one hand and a copy of Lord of the Flies in the other. 

What a wonderful tale, she mused pleasantly. 

Her beloved dog Scout lay curled at her feet. She could hear the whistling wind beating against the side of her house, but armed with two blankets and a cup of hot tea, Mrs. Y could take on any Jack Frost that peeped into her house.

Another wonderful Christmas break morning, she thought. Those kids from Advanced Composition Section 1 are awesome, but they sure are a handful.

Unbeknownst to her, the sounds of helicopter blades and a powerful V8 engine hid behind the stormy world of wind surrounding the house.

—————

A large twin-rotor helicopter hovered over Mrs. Y’s house. Three youngsters in paratrooping gear stood in front of the open door. The blizzard made it impossible to even see the other end of the helicopter, let alone the ground, and only by GPS did the chopper pilot know that they were indeed above their drop zone.

“You ready, Peter?” a wavy-haired redhead shouted.

“Do I look like I’m ready?!” replied Peter.

“Absolutely!”

“Absolutely not!” Peter retorted.

Suddenly, a long-haired brunette grabbed both boys by the shoulders.

“Come on, you two! We’re nearing our drop zone! You sure you aren’t ready, Peter?”

“Okay fine!” Peter exclaimed. “The Trio! Peter Quantz, Adam the bro, and Sara Madigan, the sister from…”

“Michigan.” 

“Right. Michigan. Well, let’s hop to it!” 

“Geronimo!” Adam cried exuberantly.

“Let’s bounce!” Sara shrieked.

They jumped, plunging deep into the heart of the swirling blizzard.

—————

A dilapidated station wagon with rotted wood paneling tore through the streets of Richmond, devouring corners and floating over potholes like a Corvette. Inside, a dude in a baseball cap recklessly wrangled the suspiciously sporty-looking pedals and steering wheel. 

“Hey Andrew, you ready to do this?” 

Andrew stretched, keeping his hands firmly on the wheel. 

“Mari, I’ve been planning this little gig for sixty-three days, and now you ask me if I’m ready? You can’t just go visit your English teacher over Christmas break without a plan. Remember, this is our way of proving that we are indeed the best section of Advanced Comp. I even wrapped her gift a month early!”

“Wait, hang on,” Mari exclaimed before Andrew could continue his spiel. “I’m getting a call from our lookout.” 

—————

An F-15 fighter jet ripped through the sky, waking every hibernating animal within a two mile radius.

The pilot yelled into the intercom, “Mari, we’ve got a surprise on our hands! Danger on the horizon! I’m picking up three hostile-looking vehicles headed your way, about 20 miles out still. They almost look like those trucks from Section 5…you’ve heard the rumors. It can’t be them though; they wouldn’t have found us! This was supposed to be a complete Christmas surprise for Mrs Y.”

Mari’s voice broke in, crackling. “Alright. I think we’ve still got time. Keep me posted, Matthew.”

—————

Still unaware of the shenanigans happening outside, Mrs. Y set her cup of tea down and carefully placed a conch shell onto the pages of her book before standing up. Suddenly, a strong gust of wind flung a tree branch into the door, echoing a loud bang throughout the house. 

“C’mon, Scout,” Mrs. Y whispered. “Let’s see what’s going on.”

She glanced through the peephole but couldn’t see anything. Throwing on a coat, she shrugged and opened the door, only to see a gnarly tree branch lying on the porch. 

“Must just be the wind.” 

Hustling back into the warmth of her house, she suddenly caught a glimpse of something—or rather, somethings—falling from the sky. Looking up, she noticed three paratroopers descending onto her snowy lawn. 

Having slightly miscalculated the effect of the wind, the trio unceremoniously rolled onto the porch before jumping up and shouting, “Merry Christmas, Mrs. Y! It’s us! Your favorite students!”

“Ah!” she exclaimed with a look of shock washing across her face. “The kids from AC Section 1! I was not expecting you at all! But…” she asked curiously as Andrew and Mari’s vehicle roared into her driveway, “What’s this station wagon here?”

“Oh, this hunk of junk?” Sara grinned, lifting an eyebrow in suspense. “You’ll see.”

Andrew and Mari flung the doors open and leaped out. Mrs. Y gasped in horror as Andrew viciously kicked the front fender. Suddenly, to her amazement, the old wooden panels fell off to reveal a glistening bronze Chevy Corvette.

“Beautiful! Now, I just see Andrew, Adam, Peter, Mari, and Sara here. Where are the others?” Mrs. Y wondered.

“Lizzie’s on her way,” Peter remarked. “So are Sean, Bronwyn, Luke, and Caleb. Samuel said he might show up too. Matthew’s our lookout and aerial contact.”

“Aerial contact?”

“Were you wondering how we managed to get a gigantic military-grade heli to drop us semi-illegally into the middle of Virginia?” Peter quipped.

“I see. And…how do the rest plan on arriving?” Mrs. Y queried suspiciously.

“Well, I guess you’ll just have to see!” Adam grinned mischievously. “But…could we get inside? We’re a bit frozen.”

 

Chapter 2: In which something happens, and cereal is eaten.

“Please, make yourselves comfy. The storm’s making everything go crazy. We’re just lucky to have power.”

“Mrs. Y, you’re the best,” Mari declared.

 The five staggered into the kitchen and immediately raided the fridge. Mrs. Y hurried off to grab more blankets while the kids made themselves comfortable. By the time Mrs. Y returned, they had already cleaned out the cereal shelves and were warming up pots of milk on the stove. The kitchen echoed with the sounds of Peter, Adam, and Andrew laughing at jokes while Sara and Mari watched the stove and placed bets on which pot would begin steaming first. 

Well, it’s nice to be taken at one’s word once in a while, Mrs. Y thought, amused. 

Mrs. Y called out, “Even though the oven’s nice and warm, I bet a seat in the living room would do you good. Yes, you can bring the cereal. Just don’t spill any.”

“I claim the couch!” 

“The floor’s all mine, no touchy.”

Mari grabbed a marshmallow out of Sara’s bowl of Lucky Charms, Peter and Andrew shoveled Cocoa Puffs into their mouths, and Adam dumped both into one bowl as the five plopped onto the couches. Andrew fired up the TV, and Adam, superpowered by his “lucky chocolates,” reached into his backpack and threw a DVD into the player with precision that would make a professional spittoon spitter blush.

Andrew’s and Mari’s jaws dropped in disbelief, while Peter, Sara, and Adam munched on their bowls of sugary deliciousness with disinterest. 

“What? I’ve been practicing,” Adam responded, noticing the expression on their faces.

—————

“Running low on fuel,” Matthew said to himself. “I’ve gotta radio Ma….”

He felt a sudden, violent buffeting and grabbed the control stick.

“Unusually strong turbulence, even for this snowstorm,” thought Matthew. 

Suddenly, his stomach dropped, and he tugged the stick back while glancing at his altimeter. He tapped the screen, but it stayed consistent.

He was plunging down at almost two hundred feet per second.

“How…what…?” 

Matthew jammed his throttle forward and pulled up, hoping he wouldn’t stall or run out of fuel. Although he couldn’t see outside, his display told him he was flying level. Yet he was still dropping thousands of feet per minute.

No more games, he told himself as he pressed the radio button.

“Mayday, mayday, mayday. This is Matthew, Section 1. Mari, do you copy? Over.”

No answer.

“Mari? Are you there?”

Great, now I have to deal with an apparently supernatural force and a fuel problem at the same time. Well, I’ve seen worse days.

Suddenly, he heard a high-pitched cackle of laughter over his set.

“Hey, Matty.”

He choked back the urge to scream into the mic that his name was MATTHEW and not MATTY, but he managed to resist.

“Nothing? Hello? Are you there, Matty? This is Mari.”

Same voice, only no cackle. A voice that didn’t belong to anyone from Section 1 and certainly not Mari. This was just too creepy. Matthew decided to stay quiet, not wishing to reveal any information until the caller identified herself.

“I must say, Matty, your silence is astounding. Now, even if you won’t call in, I know you are there. Resistance is futile. We are pulling your plane toward the ground with our Section Five Super-Secret Super-Magnet Suction Weapon.”

An S.F.S.S.S.M.S.W.? 

Matthew’s eyes narrowed. His training instantly kicked him into action.

Pulling the ejection cord, he popped the cover off his cockpit and shot himself off into the dark, swirling air. Below him, his beloved jet ran out of fuel, died, and plunged toward the earth like a silent dart. Matthew, dazed from the shock of the cold air, barely managed to pull his chute before sinking into the heart of the storm.

 

Read the rest of the story here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1amf-yAA2pkBn18k_0HmfV8JsAqdjQxKpwwI7pe0XGgw/edit?usp=sharing

______________________________

Meet the Authors

                 
Andrew Berry                                                                            Adam Quantz

Featuring: Andrew Berry, Samantha Campbell, Luke Cheung, Caleb Cullum, Bronwyn Dix, Lizzie Jacobs, Matthew Jones, Samuel Laake, Sean Lowe, Sara Madigan, Mari Stanton, Adam Quantz, and Peter Quantz.

354 Comments

  1. Oh that’s soooo good!

  2. Hehe this is great! Can’t wait to read the rest!
    And, I agree, Mrs. Yagel is the best English teacher ever. Besides the other English teachers at TPS.

  3. YASSSSSSSSSSS LOVE THIS >:D

  4. Awesome work guys!! Awesome to see the story finally published!

  5. This is actually what happened, right, but far exaggerated in most of the details?

    • There is no exaggeration, even in the most minute details. This is exactly what happened, as recorded by us very trustworthy eyewitnesses.

      • My above comment addressed the fact that my class would have done something very similar to this (but with far less extreme measures), but there aren’t any other sections besides mine for MRR History and Lit… I assumed what happened to you was the same sort of thing. Also, how come I’ve never seen your Corvette, despite coming to your house once when you were at home and seeing your driveway and the inside of your garage? Had you not acquired it yet? Where did you get the money for it? Finally, what did you think when you found out how much they had spent on nerf guns?

        • Very good questions.
          As for the Corvette, when you came over, it was at the shop being fitted with new brakes and racing tires, as well as repairing the engine block, which they discovered was slightly cracked from overheating. *glares at Adam* I had the nitro switch removed.
          In a strange turn of events, the Corvette actually came to me from General Motors after they read my article about the 2023 Ford GT. GM lured me in with the Corvette and a hefty salary. Now my full-time job is spying on GM’s competitors, especially Ford. (yes, I lied in the story about how I acquired the Corvette)
          I wasn’t too happy when I found out how much my classmates had spent on nerf guns, but I wasn’t devastated either because almost my entire salary has been rotting in the bank with nowhere to go. Most of my expenditures so far have been related to repairing the Corvette.
          If you or anyone else has any more questions, I’m glad to answer them.

          • Some of the timing seems off here. First, I’m pretty sure (but not absolutely sure) that I came to your house in the summer, which depending on which Christmas break the adventure happened on, would seem to be too early or late to take care of the Chevy – in other words, either Adam wouldn’t have damaged it yet, or you waited around six months to get it fixed from its ordeal, unless you had done that earlier and fixed it earlier, and I am reading your above comment wrong. Second, your article about the Ford GT came out earlier this month, after you already had the Chevy in the story, so you couldn’t have gotten it that way – and who with a high position at GM reads clay? I’d like to know, so if you are there, person who hired Andrew, reading this, please comment below to prove to me you exist. Besides, when Ford traces the leak of its GT Supervan to your article, they will be bound to follow you very closely on clay, and then they will almost certainly read your above comment, and carefully shield all of their projects from you, and you will lose your salary from GM and will no longer be able to keep your Corvette, because, as you have said, most of the money you have spent from your salary has gone to the Corvette, and with that gone, your remaining NBB money would run out quickly.

          • Sorry that was so long, i had a lot of thoughts at once.

          • Hmmm… I thought you came over to our house earlier this year. If so, the Corvette was in the shop. If it was the summer, I did not own the Corvette yet.
            Also, it’s a fair question regarding the GT article. In actuality, I wrote and published the article nearly half a year ago, and simply tweaked and tailored it to fit the needs of clay.
            And finally, regarding your comment on Ford tracking me down, now you know why I use a pen name/pseudonym.

          • Anonymous GM Executive

            Yes, to answer your question Anon M., we at GM did in fact hire the author of the GT Supervan article.

          • Your pseudonym only shows up on the comments, not the articles, and its pretty obvious that you are the same person because of the picture. Also, a quick internet search of Beren Erchamion can quickly reveal you borrowed a name from the Silmarillion. A pseudonym does not make you anonymous – I use one, and even though I don’t ever have my real name with my profile, unlike you, and most of the people on tps who know me know who I am (I assume you do?) Also, I am deeply suspicious that the “anonymous GM executive” is you, or that he is someone you told to write the comment, both because you have your own picture for your profile and could just remove that to have a generic profile, and because whoever wrote it wrote it immediately after you wrote the previous comment.

          • Young Lepnig, you are a fellow of astute observatory skills. However, it will get you in trouble some day. I suggest that, for your own sake, you cease asking probing questions and let the matter be. Otherwise you may find that GM is suing you.

          • Well, to be fair, I’m in this story so nothing really makes sense. I am the logic breaker in any story I enter XD

          • Beren, the observation skills are not what get me in trouble, just telling everyone what I see. Besides, why would GM sue me, since I’m proving to everyone that you don’t actually work for them? Are you saying I will eventually possess leaked information about GM’s next car and then write an article about it like you did about the 2023 Ford GT? (and why did you have to call me “Lepnig”? I honestly would prefer you call me Anon M.)

          • I called you Lepnig because why not

          • Hey Beren, did all of the fivers bring siblings with them, or did some of them leave them at home?

          • hmm…. good question. I actually wanted to interrogate a fiver on that, but I never got the chance. So I really don’t know. But I would guess, judging by the sheer number of fivers, that all of them who had siblings brought them.

          • Well, I can tell you for pretty sure that not all of them did. A person from my class who I have generally found trustworthy is a sibling of a fiver, and that person denied going to Virginia over the winter break without me telling why i was asking about it.

          • Ok, well I suppose those who brought siblings must have brought extra to make up for those who didn’t.

          • But you admitted to Hacking the GM exec’s account here
            https://clay.at-tps.org/2020/04/20/the-amazing-beginnings-of-the-big-wig/
            So I think you would be the one in trouble with GM, right?

  6. Honorable members of Section 1,

    We applaud the effort that must have gone into the making of this tale, and we are glad to be a part of it. It is a mark of your intelligence that you could bring about such a heist.

    However, we disagree strongly with much of the above story, in which we are portrayed largely as evil, but quite magnificently stupid, villains. We most resolutely disagree with your claim to be the best section.
    Although we do not have the time to cover all the falsehoods represented in the story above, indeed, we did not read the entire document because we do actually have other things to do with our lives, we will take a moment to point out a few things that are clearly marks of not being the best section, and instead point to our supremacy.
    Let us begin with the URL for this web page, which says “Let the intersectional wars begin.” First of all, intersectional is not a word. Secondly, if there were such a word, it would describe a conflict that began long ago. Section 5 asserted its dominance for the first time by posting shout-outs on TPS’s student home page. This stirred up indignation in the lower classes, who then began to come up with schemes to attack the rightfully best. Our being the instigators points to our superiority, as the other sections only thought that they were the best once we reminded them of the subject.

    Furthermore, it appears that Section 5’s rivals all have an inflated view of their importance. Section 5 has received information that at least 3 other TPS English sections are involved in this war. Section 1 believes that this is a struggle between 1 and 5, Lit Survey #5 thinks they’re up with #5, and Section 4 also believes that they’re out main opponents. What is in common between all these classes? They all recognize that section 5 deserves to be in the conversation. That’s because, we can tell you, we are.

    For the title now. I mean, making Mrs. Y laugh is not a huge accomplishment. We did the same when she substituted for us.

    Writing a 50 page story just imagining some strange scenario in which they could possibly be thought of the best shows how far Section 1 is from being the best, too.
    Finally, our students noted that the fact that section one wrote a 50 page rant about how they’re the best just screams insecurity.

    In conclusion, we are glad to see that the other sections of TPS English recognize us in their arguments about superiority. They should, because we are the best.

    Long live Section 5, long live Mrs. T, and long live Mrs. Yagel.

    • Distinguished members of Section 5,

      We applaud the effort that you must have taken to compose such a lengthy response to the richly rewarding fruits of our labor. We admire your wholehearted dedication to supporting your cause of being the “best,” though it took us considerable self-control and Christian goodwill to overlook the logical holes and grammatical errors in your argument.

      First of all, your claims attacking our URL are entirely false. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, “intersectional” is indeed a word meaning “to involve members of multiple social categories” or “to exist between sections.” We believe most academic institutions and instructors, Mrs. Y and Mrs. T included, would consider the Merriam-Webster dictionary a reliable source of information, and thus, our usage of that word is entirely correct. Furthermore, while Section 5 may have initially posted shoutouts on Studyplace, no other sections subsequently took any organized action to retaliate. In other words, it was a failed attempt at sparking hostilities. Months later, this story indeed does light the initial fires of a true “intersectional war” with both sides clearly involved.

      To continue, the only reason we portrayed Section 5 as the so-called “villains” (although we are by no means perfect heroes either) in this wild tale is due to the fact that you fired the first shots by posting the aforementioned StudyPlace shoutouts. Had Sections 2, 3, or 4 done the same, we would have proceeded similarly against them. We harbor no special animosity against you simply for being Section 5. We speculate that other rivalries against you may be due to that as well. You do not “deserve” to be in any such conversations; you simply placed yourselves in those positions by making claims that you cannot support with concrete, specific evidence. However, portraying you or our rivalry in such a manner was not our intended purpose with this story.

      Regarding our title, in no way did we claim that we are the only section who can make Mrs. Y laugh. Rather, as one of her regular classes, we have proof that we indeed possess the capability to make her laugh every class period. The title in itself was not at all designed to “attack” you but to simply describe the entertaining nature of our Tuesday afternoon classes.

      We continue to steadfastly dispute your claims of being the “best,” but please know that we do not selfishly claim the title for ourselves. We originally wrote this piece for a higher purpose, but considering that you did not have the time to even read our entire story, we can only conclude that you are too busy to hear our true reasons and motivations behind writing this.

      In conclusion, we challenge YOU to challenge US. You took the first shots in StudyPlace shoutouts; we took up the nerf guns and water balloons in return. It is now your time to shine. Give us what you’ve got, and may the best section emerge victorious. So bring forth Jimmy and his pot of iced tea! Let’s battle this out–but only if you want to. In the end, we were just having fun. We hope we can do that together and be HAPPY.

      P.S. If you don’t get some of the things we mentioned, take a 20 minute break and read our story in its entirety. It’ll be worth it.

      Long live Section 1, long live Mrs. Yagel, and may Section 5 learn to be on peaceful terms with all sections.

      • Section 1,

        We unfortunately do not have sufficient time at the moment to respond to your entire comment. However, I’ll point out a couple of things: Other classes did have their own form of retaliation after our initial move. I heard directly from 2-3 classes following the declaration that they had made specific moves to challenge us.
        Also, we do not have specific, concrete evidence, but that is simply because there is no standard to measure a class by. Some are just defined by greatness. We realized that greatness from the beginning and therefore shouted it to the world. The rest only tried to find that greatness because they heard about us.

        Furthermore, you did “selfishly claim the title” for yourselves. Just read the tags on this article.

        Of course, the goal for us was also fun from the beginning. None of our criticisms were meant to tear down.
        We are working on our response. It may take a couple of weeks, but we’ll be sure to let you know when we have struck back.

        Long live Section 5, long live Mrs. T and Mrs. Yagel, and may all sections of Advanced Comp survive the coming timed essays.

        • Our best wishes to you as well regarding the dreaded timed essays. May all sections of Advanced Comp learn to perpetually wage good-natured intersectional war.

      • Section 1,

        Section 5 has come up with a challenge. As an ultimate test of English writing, we propose a grand sentence craft competition. It will work like this:
        Section 1 and Section 5, or at least as many of them as possible, will meet in Study Room 1 of GP7 on Saturday the 2nd of May at 4:00 GMT (UK time). Each side will also have another means of communication (another GP room or a hangouts chat, perhaps). A Section 5’er will present on the screen and will put a sentence on the screen, and each team will have two minutes to edit and beautify the sentence before reporting back to the room. Then, the host will present another sentence, and so on for seven sentences total. The host will then collect all the sentences note which belong to which team. Then, the host will send the original sentences, along with the edited versions, to Dr. Leake, the third Advanced Comp teacher and thus a neutral judge. He will, without knowing which sentence belongs to which team, decide which sentence wins each challenge. The team that wins the most sentences wins the event.
        You may be wondering about the neutrality of the host. The host will be a Section 5’er, true, but will not have seen the sentences before posting them on the screen. This ensures fair play.
        As to the matter of which sentences to edit, we would love some suggestions. Currently one option is that a sibling of a Section 5’er would create the seven sentences (deliberately poorly crafted) and send them by hangouts separately during the event. We would be happy for Dr. Leake to create the sentences, but we don’t want to do so as we don’t want him to spend more time than he already has to on this challenge that has absolutely nothing to do with him. As we said, we would like suggestions on this point.
        The sentences will be graded on superiority of sentence craft, but also on sticking as much as possible to the original meaning of the sentence.

        Just to be clear, the winner of this challenge is not necessarily declared the best section. We just thought it would make a fun and competitive challenge. After all, who doesn’t want to be crowned the better writers?

        May Section 5 live forever. Long live Mrs. T.

        • I think you should have someone neutral craft the sentences AND be the host. I recommend Mr. Crosby.

        • We accept the challenge. May both sections make their teachers proud with their sentence-crafting skills.

        • lol, Dr. Leake should just disqualify both sections and nominate one of his own as best section

          • well it’s been made clear that this contest is not to determine the “best section.” It’s just for fun and some friendly competition.

          • eh, bragging rights are on the line though, and if any of y’all end up in the same English class next year, I’m sure it will come up. Anyway, good luck in the contest!

    • Ohhhh so this is what this war is all about. Seems like we section 7 students are very ignorant. Or just very peaceful.

      May the section God deems best win, if it is His will!

  7. Yikes!! 2018-2019 AC Sec #8 has some competition :D.
    There are definitely some AC section rivalries coming up… 😉 ;D Time for fun!!!!!!
    Also, Mrs. Y is 9000% the best English teacher!!! Don’t tell Mrs. T.

    • hehe I look forward to seeing your guys’ comeback. Long live the intersectional wars, and may the best section win!

  8. Hahahahahahahahahah those section fivers got put in check!

  9. A literary critique:
    It doesn’t make sense that this tension/conflict got escalated through the whole story, and then suddenly stopped with just a little music. I think you could have come up with a more elegant ending. Furthermore, you guys don’t seem to care much for Mrs. Y, leaving her stranded with a broken-down car over night in the middle of December… I think the safety your English teacher should probably be a little higher on your priorities list.
    Other than that, that was quite a story and definitely had me laughing and reading more, when I probably should be doing HWs.
    Finally, stay safe during quarantine; the last thing we need is a biological war between the sections with a COVID-19 super-laser.
    PS: Flip-phones are the BEST!!!!! 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 Until you try to find non-existent replacement battery parts. D: D: D: D: D:

    • IKR I feel bad for poor Mrs. Y… ;-;

    • I begin by saying: I respect your opinion. I follow up by saying I disagree.

      You believe the ending wasn’t elegant, or at least anticlimactic, but keep in mind this is no ordinary song. This is HAPPY by Pharrell Williams. The most controversial song on the planet: people either love it or hate it. Thus, people bond over it.

      Second, you have to keep in mind who put Mrs. Yagel on the road in the first place. Suffice to say, WE didn’t call Mrs. Y to get her out of the house for certain unknown nefarious purposes XD. Also, it worked out for her, because she got to drive the SWEETEST TRUCK EVER THE F-150!

      Third, no bioweapons were involved. Just nerf guns and water balloons and the occasional taser. The fun weapons 😉

      But, these things aside, I’d like to thank you for taking the time to comment. And, I’m glad you laughed! That was sort of one of the purposes of our writing this monstrosity of a story: to make our teacher laugh. But that also stretches to others and letting them laugh at its utter silliness as well.
      Thanks!

      • I never said there were any bio-weapons involved; I was just warning against the future use of them in intersectional wars.
        I wonder if Section 5 will ever take responsibility for calling Mrs. Yagel, and ultimately stranding her in mid-December. As for your driving skills, I am less than impressed. On the other hand, you may be the first person ever to melt a Corvette’s brake disks in a mid-winter snowstorm.
        Finally, About the tasers; A cyber-truck has much more electric power than a taser. I find it more likely that the taser would die than the cyber-truck. Maybe there would be some short-circuits and some fires too, but I doubt that the truck would just die.
        Conversely, I know nothing about tasers, so I may be wrong.

  10. This is very funny!

    Even though there were a lot of cool cars, I feel that this article could have really used a self-driving car.

    • Thanks! 😀
      Actually, an earlier draft of the story specifically mentioned Sean putting the Cybertruck on Autopilot as he and his folks rushed to Mrs. Y’s house. For some reason that tidbit was edited out.

  11. Cute. But Section 8 is superior, I’ll have y’all know!! SOPHISTICATED antics for the win!! 😎👌😁

    • Section 8 IS the BEST!! That was my section last yr.!!! WE WAR IN ALL CAPS TOO!! (now obviously, the sections are different, since mine was from last year, but maybe the conflict should be tied to section numbers, so that we can get veterans from previous generations in on it)

  12. I read the whole thing it was So funny I was laughing very hard. Hey, Section 5, do any of you even own 1 nerf gun?

  13. This just made my day!

  14. What about sections #2, #3, and #4? What is their say in this matter?

  15. FOR GONDOR!!

  16. The hour grows late when Section five of Advanced Comp rides to Isengard, seeking my counsel.

    In case you are wondering the meaning of the phrase above, I will explain. During the Joke contest, one the Fivers rode to Orthanc to beg me for help. Not knowing any better, I sent them one of my men (that was the burly Fiver who fought Andrew). However, I regret my action and am pleased that Section 1 was able to win.

    Long live Section 1 and Isengard!!

    Also, if you are wondering why Section 5 started this war in the first place, it is because of their excessive consumption of mushrooms! They addled their brain and yellowed their teeth.

    • Wait so Jimmy was a uruk-hai in disguise??? O.o
      glad I didn’t know that at the time, otherwise I would never have been brave enough to fight him!

      • None other than Ugluk himself. Congratulations on your prowess and I wish you could have been at Helm’s Deep when we needed you.

        • Why thank you. Unfortunately, I hate to break it to you, but I would have fought on the side of Rohan (and possibly the Galadhrim, depending on whether or not you hold to the Tolkienian or Jacksonian tradition). As one of the great heroes of ancient men and an ancestor of Elrond, Aragorn, Arwen, and many others, I would certainly have taken sides against your forces.

          • Ugh its so confusing when someone has dual identities, and one is real and the other is fake, and its impossible for both of them to be real…

          • Of course I know which one of them is your real one, but its hard when we’re goofing around to reconcile them.

          • How distressing. And after all I’ve done for Middle Earth. I mean, I did successfully diagnose the problem with the section fivers: MUSHROOMS!!

          • @Anon M. lol ikr
            @Saruman You certainly did give an accurate diagnosis, but that does not mean that I will march in the ranks of the Uruk-hai.

      • Saruman the Wisest

        Their love of the Halflings’ mushrooms has clouded their minds.

        • @beren: BUT IT IS AN HONOR TO BE ASKED TO MARCH IN THE RANKS OF ISENGARD! I am surprised that you do not want to join me. But oh well, such are the ways of mortals.

          • Do not speak to me of honor. I, a mere man, won the hand of Luthien, fairest of all the elves and one with the blood of the Maiar in her veins. I know more of honor than you think.

          • Well, if you really want to side with my enemies, just remember: you are not fighting a rabble of mindless orcs, you are fighting Uruk-hai. Their armor is thick, their shields broad. Not to mention that they have battering rams, axes, chopping swords, and bombs. But if you still want to join the men of Rohan, then go ahead.

          • The men of Rohan have horses 😎😎

          • Certainty of death, small chance of success– well, what are we waiting for?

  17. This is so hilarious xD y’all portray yourselves as such amazing warriors.
    The part where I really cracked up was where Adam finally gets around to asking Sam, “So, what state are you from?” and I was like, “WOW, you have been together for like five min and you finally ask!!”

    • *is deeply offended*
      Your statement implies that you do not believe that we are actually amazing warriors. I beg you to reconsider your position. Could even average warriors have accomplished the feats recorded in this story? We created devastating war machines in record time, blasted away our opponents with them, spared no expense to ensure victory, and sent shockwaves rippling through the TPS community. We are indisputably amazing warriors.
      LOL yes that part was great! Haha Adam wanted it to be a recurring theme throughout the story, where he keeps asking her and never gets an answer, but sadly it didn’t work out.

      • Yeah I’m still kind of shocked honestly, after all the amazing feats you performed, that you wasted your talents on a little argument over superiority. 😉
        (P.S. Did you go bankrupt after all the expense??)

        • We actually were not planning on fighting for our superiority. We took a trip to Mrs. Y’s house to surprise her and give her a Christmas present. (it kind of got lost in the ensuing shuffle)
          Well… no, I didn’t go bankrupt from the nerf guns. However, I almost did go bankrupt from the cost of the repairs to the Corvette. I had to get the brakes and tires replaced. The engine block, which was cracked from the heat, also had to get repaired. Unfortunately, though, I just got the Corvette back from the shop and found out that Sam’s hot chocolate had spilled on my nice blue cloth trimmed seats and now they’re badly stained. It’s gonna be an expensive bill to get that washed out.

          • Simple fix–spill hot chocolate on the rest of the seats. Then they’ll all be the same color, and you can save a couple bucks xD

          • I have to say, that’s an interesting idea and a potential fix. However, I do prefer having my seats nice clear blue as opposed to a muddy brown.

  18. We, the distinguished Members of The Best Class of the Century, do put forth this Statement:

    Long before your class existed, Advanced Composition (Honors) #08, 2018-2019 received the title, “The Best Class of the Century.” We retain this title to this day.
    We bestowed upon Mrs. Yagel the title “The Best Teacher of the Century” and had the honor of being her first and foremost class at The Potter’s School.
    The class was a blast. Among our members were a future Senior Editor of clay, a future prizewinner in the National Bible Bee competition, an award-winning programmer, the top speaker of NCFCA, an elevator fanatic, an M&M-lover, and many more amazing people. After a year of going rogue, Wild Things, benevolent dictatorships, joyful tears, off-tune happy birthdays, and learning to write, we decided that this class could not just end here.
    We set a meeting in Chicago. Though the meeting ultimately never occurred (Mrs. Yagel was unable to attend), many of us to this day carry on the legacy of The Best Class of the Century in AP English Literature and Composition with Mrs. Yagel, which is by far the best English class of the year.

    Signed,
    The Best Class of the Century.

    P.S. We have convened and agreed that, if we ever visit Mrs. Yagel, we will be on our best behavior and bring our favorite books (such as The Hobbit, Jane Eyre, and Shakespeare’s plays) and some cookies.

    • P.P.S. We have a whole quotebook (credits to Ethan Jo, our elevator fanatic) from our class.

    • Just getting around to this, but i can vouch for the statement above. Section #8 2018-2019 was ultimately the Best section. From the crazy birthday song… to hands (pointer tool) sticking out of coffins we really experienced it all. So sections 1 and 5 you go battle it out, but in the end will shall remain “The Best Class Of The Century.”

  19. Furthermore, we have compiled a document of quotes. HOWEVER, it is classified info. So you’ll just have to take our word for it.

  20. But you admitted to Hacking the GM exec’s account here
    https://clay.at-tps.org/2020/04/20/the-amazing-beginnings-of-the-big-wig/
    So I think you would be the one in trouble with GM, right?

    • Ooooop….. you in trouble now Andrew!!! *cough*

      • I beg to dispute that comment. I may or may not actually be the GM executive myself. (I think you’re getting the point that I have a large number of alter egos)

        • What are you playing at!?
          If you are the GM Exec, you can’t hire yourself, and you also can’t hack your own account. (Ok, well, you COULD hack your own account, but in the context this doesn’t make any sense)

          • Well think about it this way: If I’m already hired by GM in the capacity of an executive, then I can use that position to hire myself in the capacity of a spy. It may not make sense, but trust me, having multiple alter egos can be very useful.

          • I’m pretty sure GM would consider that embezzlement.

          • Especially if you got yourself a corvette and a salary when you did that.

          • No, it’s not embezzlement, because GM knows and trusts that I will amply repay the expenses with all the spy information I gather.

          • I really don’t think the other execs would like that so much. The reason is that your going off to spy will take away from your availability at the office, and thus reduce your capacity for executive functions. You can’t have 2 jobs, without compromising one of them.

          • I’m sorry, but it appears that you cannot comprehend my amazing multi-person capabilities

          • Unfortunately, that statement is structured in a way that I cannot logically refute. If I say that I do comprehend your skills, then you will say that I should be able to understand how you hired yourself.
            If I say that I do not comprehend your skills, then you will say that I do not understand how you hired yourself.
            Stay tuned, though. I have more coming. 😉

          • This is what happens when you attempt to debate a section 1’er. You get yourself in a logical trap and all other kinds of traps.
            LOL XD JK

  21. I must admit, this was a masterpiece! Great job!

  22. Wow!! 100 comments!! Good job lol

  23. What about sections that are not 1 or 5? Did they know about this? Were they involved in any way, such as espionage, etc? I don’t see any representation, so perhaps they don’t want to get involved.

    • I can’t speak for them, because there is always the slight chance that they were able to spy on our proceedings, but I have to say, the security net that was the combination of 1 and 5’s troops was pretty tight.

      • Hm, but the radio communications were not, as Section 5 was able to jam them, and find Mrs. Y’s phone number, and Matthew’s F15 band.
        So, another section could just have eavesdropped and heard everything going on.
        On the other hand, they would have probably leaked all the info before the press release here, so they probably didn’t.
        Also I think you may have some problems with your plot, that may render your account slightly in-credible.
        1: How did Mrs. Y know what you looked like when GP6 doesn’t have webcam, so the most she can hear is your voices?
        2: How does bulletproof glass shatter because of a soccer ball!?!?!?!
        3: Why would Section 5 put stickers on their trucks and cars identifying them? That’s not very smart if they wanted to launch surprise-attacks.
        4: A Honda Acty van is not a US-spec vehicle. While it’s technically legal to import any car that is over 25 years old, I find it quite unlikely that section 5 would want one enough to get it. I mean, they can afford Silverado HDs, right?
        *more plot holes coming later*

        • Beren Erchamion

          excellent questions. I’ll do my best to answer each of them.
          1. We may or may not have already done Zoom calls.
          2. That’s the whole point. During the Cybertruck’s official reveal (in real life), Elon Musk wanted to demonstrate how strong the glass was. So he had his assistant throw metal balls at the windows… and the glass cracked big time. It’s a reference to that.
          3. They need a way to identify each other easily.
          4. While we are not sure why Section 5 made the decisions they did, our suspicion is that they exhausted their budget on the Silverado HDs and needed something cheap to haul around the rest of their people. So they found a used Acty that had already been imported.

          • 3: Well, they could use a more cryptic symbol. I’m sure someone in sec5 would have thought about that if this whole incident happened in real life.
            4: I think a used 1st-gen Odyssey would probably be cheaper and more reliable, also bigger. I haven’t been able to find any functional Actys for sale on web searches.

  24. Grond! Grond! Grond! GROND!!!!

  25. You know, it’s sad that you all have to fight about which section is the best. Those who have to say that they are the best are really just afraid that they are not the best.
    Section #3 does not say that it is the best section because we already know we are. If we told anyone, no one would believe us anyway. But while the other sections discuss, argue, and say how good they are, we simply prove how outstanding we are through our actions. And if I remember correctly, actions speak louder than words.

    • we have yet to see these actions.

      • If y’all do see, you will only doubt, disagree, and nitpick. We’re not going to try to prove to you what is already true. It is your choice whether you believe or not, and if you disbelieve, that’s absolutely fine! The truth is the same regardless.

        There. I’ve said my piece.

        • I feel obliged to point out that while you claim that actions speak louder than words, you refuse to show any actions or even words. On the other hand, our story records plenty of actions that show our devotion to Mrs. Y.

          • We are sorry, but The first and Best Class of the Century would very much beg to differ on these so called “actions of devotion.” If you are seeking to show your devotion to dear Mrs. Yagel in a tactful way, we would not advise raiding her fridge and eating sugary cereals on her living room floor. In our minds, perhaps bringing her a nice copy of Jane Eyre and a tin of fresh cookies might leave a better impression 🙂
            Sincerely
            The first and Best Class of the Century, AC Section 8 2018-2019

          • I beg to differ. First of all, we did bring Mrs. Y a gift, but in our humility we left out what it was. And if you’re talking about these “actions of devotion,” I have to say that few actions speak louder than a guy who doesn’t even have a permit selflessly taking on a car that has the potential to be very dangerous to an untrained driver, and going out ALONE into a blizzard to try to bring help to the teacher.

          • Your actions overall brought far more hazard than otherwise necessary. Why was the teacher out in the blizzard in the first place? In addition, your reply strawmanned Claire’s original intent and meaning.
            And we see that you have yet to address our statement. Perhaps that is because we are indisputably The Best Class of the Century?

          • As always, Hannah brings up many valid and noteworthy points. As for the actions described here, I would quite agree with you. There are few actions that speak louder of foolishness than a guy who takes on a car that has the potential to be very dangerous as an untrained driver while being alone in a blizzard. Rather, I believe it is both selfish and unnecessary as there is great potential to cause injury to yourself as well as others, and, according to your story, dear Mrs. Yagel didn’t need any help at all until you arrived, being snugly wrapped in a blanket drinking tea and reading Lord of the Flies : )

          • I second Claire’s point. If it hadn’t been for you coming, which caused Section 5 to call Mrs. Yagel and persuade her to go out to save Matthew, then she would have had a perfectly fine evening of Christmas break.
            Furthermore, Adam’s act of going out to save Mrs. Y. wasn’t an act of courage at all: it was an act of caffeine-fueled recklessness.

          • OH. My bad. It was sugar-fueled recklessness. That doesn’t make it any better though.

  26. Certainty of death, small chance of success– well, what are we waiting for?

  27. Shall I describe it to you, or would you like me to find you a box?

  28. This doesn’t have much to do with this article, but does anyone know how I can change my profile pic to my Forums avatar, instead of this purple symbol? I don’t have a website but I really want my pic changed. Any advice would be great.

  29. “Memory is not what the heart desires.”

    “One does not simply walk into Mordor.”

  30. Maybe this article will be #1 on the most commented page!! 🤣🎉🥳🎊🤣

  31. Theological Analyst

    Okay, I have now decided to intervene. I have let this go too far.

    From a neutral view, this article is obviously fictional; just look at the disclaimer. Sorry Beren, but you haven’t convinced anyone.
    It might not seem like I am neutral, especially since I am a brother of a member of the so-called “Best Class of the Century.” But regardless of that, it is obvious that everyone here is trying to be the best. Section 5, Section 1, and “The Best Class of the Century” are all claiming superiority. What I am proposing, which most neutral readers will probably agree with, is that this entire exchange is pointless. Every class thinks it is the best, and no class will be remotely convinced by the others’ arguments.
    Bickering like this can be useless and even counterproductive. Paul tells us that pride puffs up, but love builds up. Sure, the point is that it is fun, but it can and has easily progressed into unproductive rivalry. Browny points, bragging rights, and titles are meaningless. And nobody here is really loving their neighbor, even if they aren’t necessarily hating them.
    Don’t take this as a nerdy, nitpicky rant. Of course you can have your fun. But not to the detriment of relationships. And I know that this may not particularly be ruining relationships, but we as Christians are charged to live at peace as much as we are able.
    This is just an opinion analysis, so I’m not saying this conversation is WRONG, but I am saying watch yourself, especially on Saturday, Sections 1 and 5.

    And no excuses, Beren, you made a thinly veiled threat of suing Anon M.

    • EXCUSES EXCUSES XD
      You’re making fair points and thank you for the reminder to act in a Christlike way. With that said, 1 and 5 have actually made a joint Hangouts group and it’s hilarious and amazing how well we actually get along. So I think it’ll be fine. Thanks though! 😀
      Also regarding Anon M., he and I know each other well and it’s good-natured joking.

      • Theological Analyst

        A few things to say:
        1. Good!
        2. I sure HOPE so…
        3. Sections 1 and 5 may want to update their security.

  32. For Gondor!!!!!!!

  33. “Concealed within his fortress, the lord of Mordor sees all.”

  34. Just thought I’d throw this out there… since we’re trying to spam you with comments Andrew…… I’m pretty excited for my article to be posted on CLAY…..!!!

  35. So how did you all insert the “For Gondor” gif in your article? i would like one in my sample article but i just can’t seem to get it to work. any help would be appreciated.

    • Hey Eli,
      We publish all clay articles through WordPress, which allows us to directly upload .gif files into the media library. If I remember right, sample articles are usually submitted as Word documents, so I don’t think it’s possible to have a gif in the sample article.

  36. BTW I’m in section 5 next year so….. SECTION 5 FOREVER!!!!!!!!

  37. Things I learned from this story:
    1. Mrs. Y has a lot of interesting stuff in her house (including hundreds of water balloons in December??), and her house has 2 stories
    2. Sections 1 and 5 must have a lot of money, with all the vehicles and communication devices they have (Section 1, why don’t you get Sean a new mic with all that money and tech you have at hand? I think in Spanish class he said his mic is bad, and he is kinda hard to hear lol)
    3. Andrew is rich and is a professor??
    4. 3 Oners are trained at using parachutes (and wow their parents let them do that?)
    5. Judging by last names, S7 is physically weaker, skinnier, more flexible, conversationally blunter, shorter, smarter, nerdier, and smaller-eyed than S1, and also consumes more rice (meaning more Asian than S1). JKJKJK don’t take this seriously, I don’t think these stereotypes are true for the majority XD
    6. S1 and S5 are easily overtaken by music
    7. S5 is gullible and makes bad jokes (no offense S5, that’s S1’s biased opinion of you probably)
    8. Mrs. Y might be annoyed at S1 for trashing her house
    9. S1 and S5 both use vague diction! They both want to prove that they’re the “best” section, but wait a minute, what does “best” mean? the funniest? physically strongest? smartest? most good-looking? most violent (if it’s this one, I can see why they’re competing for the title of best section)? Yeah, there was some dialogue that may hint that being the “best” section means making the teacher laugh and talking about off-topic things in the chat box, but still, I was confused. but maybe it’s just vague to me because I haven’t been following the war closely lol

    • Beren Erchamion

      LOL

      • 1. Idk
        2. Definitely not.
        3. If he is I wouldn’t be surprised.
        4. Their not trained, they missed the roof of a two story house and landed on the lawn. Seriously?
        5. Idk about this one.
        6. Everyone is.
        7. Idc lol.
        8. Of course.
        9. Best means not the worst and not not the best if that makes sense hehe.
        BTW I’m thinking of writing a sequel next year… guess who’s gonna win 😂😂.

        • Beren Erchamion

          we’re already writing the sequel lol
          and it’s a s1, s5 collab

          • Oh no. So is it gonna be another tie?

          • Beren Erchamion

            we’re gonna be fighting together

          • Beren Erchamion

            against the enemies of TPS

          • Who are the enemies? Common core lawyers? State teachers association managers? lol that is gonna be interesting. Also, are the writers of the sequel still gonna be in the class when it is written? Because then it might not count…hehehehe.

          • well, TPS actually has a rival school, as Mrs. Yagel told us in class. A Christian school called Veritas Academy or something. It has Veritas in the name. I’d assume it’s an online school for homeschoolers. They actually wanted their English classes to rival TPS’. Mrs. Yagel says her friend used to teach in Veritas, but she quit because they only allowed teacher’s 3 minutes to pray or some limited time like that. Apparently they got mad if the teacher prayed for too long.

          • Uhh, I used to go to Veritas hehe. It was quite fun. (I didn’t do the online stuff tho)

  38. 4. ok even if they’re not trained they have to know something about when to unfurl the parachutes
    6. maybe but not as much?
    9. nope doesnt’ make sense
    good thing i won’t have to be involved…actually no ur probably going to start talking to me about it a lot

    • 4. Everyone knows how to do that, it’s called a ripcord. Also, they jumped from an unsafe distance above the house sooooo, definitely need some practice.
      6. Sure.
      9. Totally makes sense jk hehe. I’d guess that the “best” class was the class the averaged the highest in humour, physical strength, brains, looks, and violence (against each other only, I suppose) 😂
      And you won’t be involved, though I may need help from other people though (I’m not creative at all, but creativity is mostly useless imo).

  39. 4. WHEN to pull the ripcord, not how to do it.
    9.lol?
    um, you literally just admitted that creativity IS useful. and we already talked about this: IT IS

    • 4. Oops. Pull it preferably before you hit the ground, leaving at least 50 ft. (everybody knows this). But that’s not quite the problem. The problem is that at the height they were at, there would never have been enough room for the parachute to expand in the first place.
      9. Yes, laugh.
      No, it’s not. Its only partially useful and if you don’t agree, let’s finish this on hangouts hehe.

      • Beren Erchamion

        but the paragraph did expand, which means there we are exceptionally trained.

        • Beren Erchamion

          oof I mean parachute

          • No, it means whoever was writing this didn’t take physics hehehe.

          • Beren Erchamion

            *is deeply offended*
            I took Physics with TPS
            but doesn’t Adam defy the laws of physics on a daily basis?

          • True, I forgot abt that. Well then, whoever wrote this didn’t take logic hehe. Also, @sabannah, you should have known that at the height that they were at, there was not enough space for them to reach terminal velocity W/ the parachute in time for them to slow down. Your taking fizziks rn hehe.

          • this is so weird! all these comments about the parachutes/physics didn’t show up for me earlier, along with others!
            @wet ham well have YOU taken logic? If so, no offense, but you still shouldn’t be able to judge the logicality of something, because you have made at least one logical fallacy (as mentioned by Kristin, who just took logic and is good at debate. Idr what it was, but she specifically named the fallacy you made. Additionally, you have contradicted yourself before.) We can also tell you’re not credible enough to judge how logical something is, based on the fact that you think “boys are almost always right” and that “[you’re] right because [you’re] a boy!” Pretty sure that’s a fallacy. Ad hominem? Hasty generalization? Idr them anymore lol.
            Lol when I wrote the parachute comment I didn’t remember what height they were at, or that the story mentioned the height. But wouldn’t the snowstorm complicate things (they were in a bad storm right?)? I mean, besides making it harder for the parachuters to see and stuff, they might be getting blown sideways by the wind. Would that affect when they reach terminal velocity because they are being accelerated down by gravity and sideways by wind? But then the vertical and horizontal components of velocity are separate, at least for projectiles….well I have no idea but that’s just a small possibility lol. also I’m bad at physics, you already know that 😆

          • What you have used is a personal attack fallacy. I need not say more hehe.
            As for the parachutes, the “mission” should have been aborted. When visibility is reduced and winds are higher than 30 mph, parachute jumping and HALO (or in this case, LALO hehe) jumps should be halted.

      • Idk what a personal fallacy attack is, but if it’s the same thing as ad hominem, yes, I am sort of “attacking” you, but not unjustly. You DID say those things, and I’m using what you said logically.

        • lol I can’t even reply to the right thing ugh
          about the parachutes, talk to Andrew about that, not me. I didn’t say anything about whether they should or should’ve have done that. But hey, that already did a lot of things that they shouldn’t do lol

        • You would have to supply evidence of my self contradictions in order to NOT be fallacious. Also, I was “just kidding” when I said boys are ALWAYS right, I meant their MOSTLY right.

          • Yes, self-contradictions are fallacies. You have already made those, I remember you telling that a long time ago but I forgot what they were. Anyway, I was saying that saying that you’re right because you’re a boy was a fallacy not because it was a self-contradiction, but because it contradicts the fact that girls are just as smart as boys. Even if you think boys are MOSTLY right, that’s also wrong. What makes boys more often right than girls? That’s sexist. Boys I know would think so too. Jarrett once said “It’s unethical for boys to be right, but [Matthew] stands up for us.”

          • It’s not unethical, it’s probability hehe.

          • what wdym?

  40. not everybody knows bc I didn’t know lol
    Ok, well if creativity is useless then why does God use it? I believe that He used it to make the universe and everything in it. Yes, it has order and scientific laws and constants and stuff like that which kind of seems not creative, just like a bunch of rules to govern nature. Yet, I look at the beauty of it all, the most interesting animals, the uniqueness of each person, and I see God’s creativity. I believe that God used creativity to make our beautiful, amazing, intriguing world. If it isn’t necessary for our creation to be so awesome (and therefore not require God’s creativity to make it, making creativity useless), then WHY did God make it like it is? WHY did God give us creativity? While I don’t know what God is thinking, I know that He does everything for a purpose and for our good, so He must believe creativity is useful and that we should have it.
    Creativity is useful for discovering things and building things. Even if a building is ugly and boring (and thus seems unlike a result of creativity), someone had to be creative enough to come up with the idea of a building long ago. Rutherford’s famous gold foil experiment might’ve required some creativity to design. Further, God’s Word itself uses creativity, like in the Hebrew poetry in Psalms. The authors use creativity to describe things (including God), craft similes and metaphors, and come up with beautiful poetry to praise God. The alphabet Psalm is rather creative, as it uses the alefbet for structure. Plus, many of the Psalms are songs, and writing music and lyrics to go with it requires creativity. God also used creativity (or gave it to the authors of Psalms) to hide prophecies about the coming Messiah in the Psalms.
    lol Mrs Y wouldn’t like vague diction choices but you should understand me

    • Beren Erchamion

      haha thank you for standing up for our creativity, Savannah xD

      • We should do a poll… oh well. I responded on hangouts btw and I think I won hehe.

      • @Matthew you always think you won…you think you win almost everything 😆
        What exactly makes you think you won? All I said was that I didn’t realize you thought creativity was COMPLETELY useless, but that I still think it is very useful because God uses it for His glory.

  41. Oh, sorry I didn’t see the part about hangouts lol

  42. whoops, didn’t see your comment earlier Andrew. you’re welcome lol